No pre-grad nuptials
Why getting married during college might not be the best idea
WC Editorial Board
Issue date: 11/13/09 Section: Opinion
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Perhaps the statistics of college students getting married while in school are not overwhelming, but it happens. And given the situation, some cases are understandable. But when it comes down to it, one should realize that marriage is not a piece of cake. It's not always easy.
Young couples have much to contend with in these bleak fiscal times. The workforce is down. The taxes are up. Morality is teetering on the ropes.
Jumping into marriage without a stable income or job is like jumping ship without a life jacket. That's being ill prepared for a grim reality. It's basic science that things will fall before they float. And let's not forget; we're not on the moon, here.
And what's all this talk about love? We all know those three little words. Those words that supposedly mean so much, when they really mean so little.
"I love you," she says.
"I love you," he says.
"But I love you more," she claims.
"No, I love you more," he assures.
We've all heard these types of conversations in passing. We've all wanted to write the word "sap" on both their foreheads or thought it was the cutest thing in the whole wide world.
We use those three little words so loosely; they've become as common as saying "God bless you" when someone sneezes. This is particularly dangerous given basic human nature: we often become bored, uninterested and annoyed with the drop of a dime. Attitudes and opinions change. It is natural to want to move on from one endeavor to the next.
It seems love loses its luster when students lose their sense of self.
College is supposed to be a vehicle of self-discovery. It's a unique time in one's life when they find out what truly interests them, what they're good at, what paths they might want to take. It's a time to become aware of who they really are.
One could argue that the path to marriage is often culturally defined - how you were raised, what you were exposed to, those societal expectations percolating beneath the surface.
Furthermore, perhaps some could see a few of the benefits of sharing a joint bank account or splitting the cost of bills.
But when it comes down to it, all you have is yourself. Perhaps we should see what we're made of before settling down and giving ourselves over to that unrealistic idea called the American Dream.


Viewing Comments 1 - 2 of 2
Kory w. Hines
posted 11/15/09 @ 9:18 PM CST
I disagree with this column for alot of reasons. There is no expert opinion on marriage, if a couple can't endure the fairly moderate inconvenience of College then they are probably not marriage material anyway because life gets a lot harder than study clubs and slurping down burger King at the Union. (Continued…)
Asker O. Questions
posted 11/16/09 @ 12:33 PM CST
Although I also have major issues with the original article as well, I feel a stronger inclination to respond to Kory:
If as you say 'Relationships firstly must be built on God', then one would infer that relationships not built on God are more likely for failure and such marriages more likely to end in divorce. (Continued…)
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