Campus Confidential
Traci Tyler
Issue date: 9/25/09 Section: Opinion
Long-distance relationships. Chances are you are either in one, have been in one or know someone else who has. It's just another fact of life for today's college students, who often leave loved ones behind or go separate ways when making the choice to pursue higher education. Often couples are also in different places in terms of the timeline of their education, so while one graduates and emerges into the world, the other finds him/herself returning to school alone, waiting impatiently for weekends and/or breaks.
It can be very hard to make these relationships work, especially without the presence of physical intimacy, but there are several ways to adapt to the situation while keeping the flame alive, including having phone sex.
Sure, some people might see the practice as skeezy or juvenile, but it is really a valuable tool. The great thing about phone sex is that it has the potential to be anything you want it to be. It can be as hot and heavy or as freaky as you would like, especially because you may find it easier to tell your lover to imagine doing things that you can only express in the realm of fantasy.
Be sure to make it clear, however, that if you are uncomfortable with the idea of actually doing these things that it remains strictly a fantasy, and the same goes for any idea they bring up. Don't be afraid to take the conversation in a new direction - this is about building closeness, and your lover will be sure to understand.
When having phone sex, it is best to be natural. Certainly you can embellish some details, such as describing your ratty old T-shirt as a sexy see-through teddy, or better yet, telling your lover to imagine undressing you slowly. However, don't feel like you have to make your voice husky or use language that makes you uncomfortable. After all, you aren't operating a phone sex service, but finding a new way to sustain your relationship while maintaining the intimacy that will keep you close. Don't be afraid to try it even when your partner is nearby, either. Adding spice to any relationship with phone sex is a good call.
It can be very hard to make these relationships work, especially without the presence of physical intimacy, but there are several ways to adapt to the situation while keeping the flame alive, including having phone sex.
Sure, some people might see the practice as skeezy or juvenile, but it is really a valuable tool. The great thing about phone sex is that it has the potential to be anything you want it to be. It can be as hot and heavy or as freaky as you would like, especially because you may find it easier to tell your lover to imagine doing things that you can only express in the realm of fantasy.
Be sure to make it clear, however, that if you are uncomfortable with the idea of actually doing these things that it remains strictly a fantasy, and the same goes for any idea they bring up. Don't be afraid to take the conversation in a new direction - this is about building closeness, and your lover will be sure to understand.
When having phone sex, it is best to be natural. Certainly you can embellish some details, such as describing your ratty old T-shirt as a sexy see-through teddy, or better yet, telling your lover to imagine undressing you slowly. However, don't feel like you have to make your voice husky or use language that makes you uncomfortable. After all, you aren't operating a phone sex service, but finding a new way to sustain your relationship while maintaining the intimacy that will keep you close. Don't be afraid to try it even when your partner is nearby, either. Adding spice to any relationship with phone sex is a good call.
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