Campus pedestrians: pick up your tempo
Sara Gregory
Issue date: 9/23/09 Section: Opinion
I have a theory about jaywalking. It's called jayWALKing because walking is the actual crime. If you jayRAN you wouldn't be in any trouble.
While observing the average jaywalker on Western Illinois University's campus, there are certain jaywalkers that just make you want to run them over. I bet it's these walkers that made jaywalking illegal in the first place.
You know who I'm talking about. The guy who can't walk any faster because his pants are down to his knees or the girl who can't walk fast enough in those high heels. As a result, these jaywalkers saunter by your vehicle at sloth speed, while proceeding to give you the stank eye.
It's one thing to walk in a clearly marked crosswalk. Saunter away, pedestrians! It is your right to do so at these areas.
But when a jaywalker decides that they're SO important that they have to cross the street right NOW, in front of my car, I get irritated. Then the jaywalker glares at me because my mere existence on the road implies they should hurry.
Maybe I'm really just irritated that I drive a stick shift car, and I have to downshift two gears for these slow movers. I've stalled out in neutral trying to figure out some of this year's walking speeds.
Stick or no stick, no driver appreciates the stank eye. And since the driver is kind enough not to run you over, I'd be nice to them. Pull this slow walking crap in Chicago and you would be flat in the street for not getting out of the way.
So saunter away, but not at me. Walk in the crosswalks or quicken the pace, but otherwise from now on I'll be shooting the stank eye right back at you.
While observing the average jaywalker on Western Illinois University's campus, there are certain jaywalkers that just make you want to run them over. I bet it's these walkers that made jaywalking illegal in the first place.
You know who I'm talking about. The guy who can't walk any faster because his pants are down to his knees or the girl who can't walk fast enough in those high heels. As a result, these jaywalkers saunter by your vehicle at sloth speed, while proceeding to give you the stank eye.
It's one thing to walk in a clearly marked crosswalk. Saunter away, pedestrians! It is your right to do so at these areas.
But when a jaywalker decides that they're SO important that they have to cross the street right NOW, in front of my car, I get irritated. Then the jaywalker glares at me because my mere existence on the road implies they should hurry.
Maybe I'm really just irritated that I drive a stick shift car, and I have to downshift two gears for these slow movers. I've stalled out in neutral trying to figure out some of this year's walking speeds.
Stick or no stick, no driver appreciates the stank eye. And since the driver is kind enough not to run you over, I'd be nice to them. Pull this slow walking crap in Chicago and you would be flat in the street for not getting out of the way.
So saunter away, but not at me. Walk in the crosswalks or quicken the pace, but otherwise from now on I'll be shooting the stank eye right back at you.
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